A woman is woman's worst enemy?

We were sitting with friends having a pleasant conversation one evening. On an issue, a male friend commented " women are women's worst enemies". A woman friend concurred while I protested that this was not true. I was given examples by both of how mother -in- laws illtreat daughter-in laws; mothers discriminate between son and daughter , how women bossess do not promote women colleagues and son on.

I argued that anyone who has power and is also not emotionally and spiritually evoloved will misuse power, and this is not a gender thing .Men back stab each other in work places , abuse and rape women ; and are also castest and racist. Men do it to each other and to women aswell. the same can be said about women - when ever they can . For example patriarchy gives a woman power when she has a son and later when he marries.She may then misuse power.


My friend insisted that if a woman has suffered , why is she not compassionate to another woman. I answered that suffering does not always lead to evolution, it often creates a dysfunctional personality.

And what about men who have social, political and economic power - they also abuse. You see it is not a woman thing.
But I was alone that evening , and I felt isolated .
Later when my spirit normalised I realised it is ok to be alone - but one should not feel isolated.
I need to overcome this .
Mala

Making friends with the enemy

Most women I know closely have gone through a personal hell during some stage in their life caused by:some form of discrimination , emotional, mental and physical abuse , deprivation of resources, or exploitation . In most cases the near and dear ones are the culprits- a husband , an in law and sometimes even a parent .Some women come out without a scar ; others let the scars heal , but for most women the scars fester through life. But all women have to cope .

My guess is women who are not scarred either get out of the relationship soon , or give back in equal measure. This first category use "escape and avenge" coping . There are a few other women who continue the relationship ,have healed themselves and also reformed at least partly the aggressor . This second class of women have evolved and they need to be watched.Finally women who go through life with festering wounds , unable to heal nor reform have in effect become their own enemy.

It is worthwhile to examine the coping styles of the second category of women. What do they do to heal their scars? How do they change the enemy? and finally through which strategy the enemy is now a friend? The festering category of women can learn much from them.

I do not know if it is fortunate or not , but the " escape and avenge" category of women in the present times are increasing - testimony for which is more broken marriages, nuclear households, single parents and old peoples homes today.

"Escape and Avenge" is an ugly hybrid of the masculine and feminine- A syzy of the mutated variant of female "endurance and compassion " with male " dominance and exhibitionism"

So what do women do - who become friends with the enemy- the second class of women ?